The horizon is not so far as we can see, but as far as we can imagine

WTF!? Stress Tests Prove that Banks Fine, Just Need More Bailouts

You can’t make up stupidity like this.  The Onion must be in despair, because there’s no way to satirize something so mind-numbingly moronic.  In reference to the “stress tests” of the banks:

What they are discovering may come as a relief to both the financial industry and the public: the banking industry, broadly speaking, seems to be in better shape than many people think, officials involved in the examinations say.

That is the good news. The bad news is that many of the largest American lenders, despite all those bailouts, probably need to be bailed out again, either by private investors or, more likely, the federal government. After receiving many millions, and in some cases, many billions of taxpayer dollars, banks still need more capital, these officials say.

So, to summarize. The banks are fine, but they still need to be bailed out?  IE., they’re effectively bankrupt, but it’s not as bad as we think?

Did I wander into the twilight zone?  Just how stupid do they think we are?

(Answer: it doesn’t matter, because they’ll give the banks as much money as they feel like, whether we like it or not, because that’s job 1 for the Obama administration—to bail out the masters of the universe at taxpayer expense).

In the immortal words of George H. Bush “Who cares what you think?”  Who cares what any of us think?


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  1. rumor

    I think George Orwell would be in more despair than the Onion…

  2. Tom Whipple

    How will we get the money to the banks. Through the fed? Through the fdic?

  3. senecal

    Wells Fargo today pre-announced first Q profits of $3 billion, sending the DOW up, and credited their acquisition of Wachovia as the main reason, denying that it had anything to do with the new mark to Myth rules. How can this be? What activity did they make profits on?

  4. I’ve offered to donate a body organ of their choice to the first bankster I meet on the street, but that doesn’t seem to have restored “confidence.” Oh well.

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